What it means to be a professional
Reminder: It’s time for your Weekly 1:1™
Today’s agenda: What it means to be a professional
The question on the table: Has your definition changed - and does the one you started with still have any hold on you?
Before we start: Pour another cup of tea and take a few minutes for yourself. This one is worth sitting with.
Early in my career, I thought I knew exactly what a professional looked like. She was polished. Formal. Measured in her words and careful in her presentation. She dressed the part, spoke the part, and never let anyone see her figure things out. Professionalism, as I understood it, was a performance - and a solid, convincing performance was the goal.
So with great enthusiasm and promise, I set out to become a professional. I watched the people ahead of me and I mirrored what I saw. I modulated my tone in meetings. I chose my words (and my clothing) carefully. I kept any uncertainty tucked away where nobody could see it, because uncertainty didn’t look professional, and looking professional was the point. If I could become a professional, I’d become successful.
Time went on, and something started to shift. It wasn’t dramatic - it happened gradually, the way most things do. As I started accumulating the credentials, the experience, the client relationships, the education, the network – the costume started to feel less necessary because I actually knew my stuff. Professionalism evolved from something I performed into something I had built.
That felt like arrival: I had arrived. And for a long while, it was enough (it was more than enough actually, it was great).
A recent conversation about professionalism got me thinking about all of this… and helped me to realize something new. Something that nobody told me about when I was starting out, probably because it takes decades to get to a place where it can be seen.
At this stage of a career - the stage where you’ve done the work, earned the credentials, sat across the table from enough people to know that you know what you’re doing - professionalism starts to mean something quieter. It becomes something harder to perform, because it can’t actually be performed at all.
Being professional means being present.
Not in the mindfulness-yoga sense (although I’m a big fan). Present as in: actually here, in this conversation, with this person, without any artifice. Present as in: more interested in understanding, than being understood. Present as in: willing to say “I don’t know” without it costing you anything, because your foundation is solid enough that uncertainty is no longer a threat.
The most professional people I know at this stage of their careers are the ones who have stopped performing professionalism entirely. They walk into a room and they don’t need anything from it. They listen more than they talk. They are more interested in asking the question than formulating the response. They are, in the truest sense, of service - not because it’s the right brand position, but because that’s genuinely where they’ve landed.
BEing present is the real thing.
I think about the version of me that started out with the best of intentions, and I have such love for her. She was doing exactly what the moment required, and I have no regrets. What I know now is that the goal was never to look professional.
The goal was to become someone who didn’t have to think about it anymore. The goal was just to BE.
The question I’ll leave you with this week:
Where are you in that arc - and is the definition you’re still carrying from early in your career serving you, or just familiar?
Lisa English, ACC, CMM is a Leadership and Executive Coach and Strategic Consultant with deep expertise in Events, Travel and Hospitality. The Weekly 1:1™ publishes every Tuesday at 8am PT. Subscribe at lisaenglishsg.substack.com or subscribe below.